Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize