I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
