I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
