I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
How's work?
Spinning.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Randomize
