I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
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