He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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