Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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