I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I lost the right to judge tonight
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
