Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
