Well douche your snatch and let's go!
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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