her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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