i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Randomize
