IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
