somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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