The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
