dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
