As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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