Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Randomize
