I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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