This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
