Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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