I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize