It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
