that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Randomize
