So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
