Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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