Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
