He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
