Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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