I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize