Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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