Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
