yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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