she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
