yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
My liver is preforming stress tests.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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