I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
