Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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