It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
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