Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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