She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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