Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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