Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
