if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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