im gay
i know
yea but for you.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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