You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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