Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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