Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
