Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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