I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
