No, you can still breathe under the balls.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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