super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
